My Friend's Sentiments

I am not really good in giving advices coz I myself have a number of problems to address to but I wonder why some friends wish to share their sentiments with me. I was peeping on some friends’ Facebook accounts when a message popped up on my page. A friend caught me online and we were hooked chatting all night. She brought up a topic of some little uncertainties that she is finding some rationalization. I am posting that little hassle (that’s her term to it) of hers here.

And what do you think is troubling her? Well, it’s none other but the bitter half, err… better half, .. her husband of 28 years to be exact. She said she doesn’t actually looks at it as a problem though it’s been bothering her lately. She doesn’t know what to think of regarding the actions she’s seeing from him. In the length of years of their marriage, (almost as long as ours) she said she should have been very familiar with him. But still, she couldn’t understand his ways sometimes. To cut her story short, she thinks her husband is meaningfully trying to convey to her that she’s no longer loved coz he seldom spends time in their home anymore. On weekdays, he would often come home late at night that sometimes would stretch to early mornings. The alibis he gives her are meetings to attend to, dinners with business officials, treats to give to government officials, a funeral wake to attend, a sports competition and a lot more others. While on weekdays, she said he would be up from bed before dawn and would leave to play his favorite sport of badminton. In short, she’s turning KSP or “Kulang Sa Pansin” . (translate: lacking in attention). More so, when the husband won’t bother spending even just a little time to talk to her about anything when he comes home or even at anytime they're alone. It’s as if she doesn’t exist there. She feels worst when the husband is too insensitive to her emotional needs. I was wordless when she revealed that they sleep together in one bed but back to back I can’t tell her that I pity her coz that would only make her feel more miserable. The best advise I gave her was to just allow him to do his thing and she just keep herself busy and not rely her happiness on him. But ain’t it too hurting? She's like a doormat to him , I presume. I feel bad for her. but how can I help her?

In fairness to the husband, which is also a friend of mine, he seems to be a responsible family man. The family is well provided for except for limited time he spends with them. I would never know that my friend is suffering deep within if she didn't tell. I hope to help her by mentioning to her husband about it but she begged not to. She would rather wait for things to come to its proper places in the right time. How and when? "It will come”, and so she believes.

I can't say so much about my friend. I just know she talks a lot and speaks her mind. She said she'll be crazy if she can't say what she feels. I feel sorry for her. I'm just hoping that she would one day find what she's longing for so she would no longer feel "KSP"!